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More about that later.  But first…

As I’m sure you figured out by the lack of screamed profanity emitting from the Atlanta area, I did end up going to  the USITT (United States Institute of Theatre Technology) convention.  The convention was fabulous.  We got to see some amazing new products out on the market, and meet some ridiculously talented people.  Like, these are people who’ve been in the tech theatre industry for 30 years and have worked with some big-time gigs.  Friggin’ amazing.

But equally interesting, (or more-so for the non-theatre geek crowd,) was the people watching.  Flowing through that convention hall was a fairly accurate cross-section of the  tech theatre industry; watching the college kids mingle with the “good ol’ boys,” you could see the future mix with the past, where the industry has been and where it was going.

Please Note: What I’m about to embark in right now is an examination of my overall impression of the members of the technical theatre industry in an attempt to further understand the field in which I work.  I realize that not everyone in the industry fits into the character descriptions that will follow; myself, my husband, and many of my friends are members of this society and few if any of us/them fit perfectly into these neat little parameters.  What I’m trying to say is that I realize that not everyone is exactly like this, so if you’re one of my tech brethren, please don’t be offended.  Share your own thoughts on the matter, but just know where I’m coming from.

Back in the day, a degree wasn’t necessary to rise in the tech world.  It certainly helped, and those with obtained higher positions, but it wasn’t the only way to enter the industry.  Often, you started out working in a shop or for a production company, and learned everything you needed to know from the guy above you.  And little by little, you worked your way up until you were working for a major theatre company.  These guys are a little rough about the edges; they curse like it’s their job and they tell jokes that would make the devil blush.  But they know their shit.  They’ve put in years and years of hard work, they know the ropes inside and out, and they’ve seen it all.  But they are also a dying breed.  The industry is changing fast, and many of these old school technicians don’t want to keep up; things have been working just fine the way they’ve always been done.

About 30 years ago, the technical theatre and design degree became more prevalent for fine arts colleges, and a new breed of tech began to emerge.  They’re more tailored, a little more refined, a little more learned.  Not that they’re any more skilled than the good ol’ boys, but they view the industry a little differently.  It’s more design based, more about art, and computers are playing a bigger part in the industry with the introduction of automation in lighting and scenery.  They’re less like the factory foreman and more like the geeks of Silicon Valley.  Less rough but waaay more nerdy.

And tomorrow’s techs are of an entirely different brand all together.  Watching the college kids run around the convention hall, they look like an odd cross-breed between the anime club and the av club; lots of black, lots of oddly colored hair, lots of smart-ass t-shirts that say things like, “If all the world’s a stage, I want better lighting.”  They’re incredibly computer savvy, and all of them either want to be lighting designers or video engineers; both jobs are incredibly technology based and spend the majority of their time behind a computer monitor.  I find it interesting to see that the type of people that the industry is attracting today is drastically different than the people that were attracted 30 years ago.  Back then, the industry did not attract the smart kids, or the artistic kids; it attracted the hard worker, the laborer, and the technician.  Those guys wanted to be carpenters, riggers, and sound guys.  Now, none of the kids coming out of college want to be riggers; they want to light dance concerts.  They’re pulling away from the labor/skill based jobs and towards those based in technology.  The industry is actually have a problem with an influx of wannabe lighting designers, while finding a scene shop foreman or head flyman is nearly impossible.  But at the same time, the technicians that are being produced are far more flexible than those of yore; they take to new technology quickly, and can follow the light-speed evolution of the industry.  And they have to; a degree from a fine arts college is now pretty much standard issue, and to even consider a position of leadership you really need a master’s degree, not to mention wads of street cred.

The technical theatre industry is by nature an odd mix of futuristic technology and old school techniques.  I’m not saying that the budding technicians of today are any better or worse or more or less qualified than those of earlier days…they’re just incredibly, incredibly different.

On a less profound note…

I also learned some things about Ohio this weekend.

1) There are more trucks than I have ever seen before.  We drove through a subdivision and there were more trucks than squirrels.

2) Fast food drive-thrus here FAIL!  Hardcore.  They’re insanely slow and their tacos suck.  Like, no lettuce or cheese, just meat and a taco shell, which in my book is not a taco, it’s a lameco.  Then on our way out of town, we stopped at a McDonald’s for breakfast.  We ordered 2 sandwich meals with hash browns and orange juice, and a fruit and yogurt parfait.  We got our juice and a bag, and when we looked inside there were 2 sandwiches…that’s it.  No hash browns, no parfait.  FAIL!

3) They have drive-through liquor stores here.  And I don’t mean a liquor store with a drive-up window; I mean a liquor store that you drive through.  It’s like driving through a convenience store; you can reach out your window and pick out a candy bar.  I don’t know if this is the most amazing or terrible thing in the world.

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Shame, Shame, Shame

I’m ashamed.

Shame 1: Not having any comments actually bothers me.  (A little. More than I care to admit.)

You see, over the last couple week or so, I’ve been a little disappointed.  I keep posting, but no one’s been commenting on any of my posts.  I’m embarrassed that this would bother me as much as it has, which is more than not at all.  I mean, I write this blog mostly for fun, so why should I give a rat’s if no one comments on it?  But I do.  Because even though I do this blog mostly for fun, half of the fun of it is seeing other people’s reactions to my posts.  The good, the bad, the irrelevant; I love them all.  I enjoy reading your encouragement, your advice, and even your outrage.  Because let’s face it, if I didn’t care about dialog with my readers, I wouldn’t bother putting my half on the internet; I’d write it in my journal the way I always have and be done with it.

Shame 2: My website apparently sucks.

Needless to say, I was a little confused as to the sudden halt in commenting.  I didn’t think I’d changed anything in the way I post.  Maybe I stopped being interesting.  Then today, I receive a lovely e-mail from Shannon, a fellow blogger that I’ve begon corresponding with.  (Badass blog, by the way.  Seriously, once you’re done perusing mine, you should go check it out.)  And in the e-mail, Shannon mentioned that she tried to leave a comment, but was unable to because the spam-blocker I have set up wouldn’t let anyone comment.  To be fair, it was doing its job; spammers couldn’t get in.  But neither could anyone else.  This was a huge relief to me, because it allows me to believe that some of you were just blocked out.  Whether this is true or not, I can’t say.  The important thing is that it lets me think that.

Shame 3: Now you’re all going to think that this post is a desperate attempt to make my blog look more popular by driving up commenting.

It’s not, I promise.  It’s more of a way to let y’all know that WordPress was being a bitch, but now it’s fixed.  I went ahead and disabled the spam-blocker because while getting spammed was annoying, I’d rather get spam and you guys than neither.  So if there was a post in the past week or so that really pissed you off and you were dying to rip me a new asshole, knock yourself out.  If there was something that really inspired you and you’d like to share your own story, please do.  If you’d like to tell me that I take my own importance entirely too seriously and to get a freakin’ life, you’re welcome to do that also.  Or you can do nothing.  I’ll begrudge you none of it.

On an entirely different note, I may or may not be going to the United States Institute of Theatre Technology convention in Cinncinati, OH this weekend, depending on whether or not work lets me go. It’s a giant convention/trade show for theatre techs (lighting, set design, rigging, costuming, sound, the whole bit,) and I’m crazy excited to go.  (Strand will be displaying their newest light board…hell yeah!)  You’ll know if I get to go because if I go, I won’t post again until Monday, and if I don’t, I’ll post once every 20 minutes or so out of sheer anger and boredom.  Here’s hoping for no new posts!  (Even if you’re voting for the wrong reasons.)

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Bad things happen when I stay at home alone all day, and they all involve the adverb ‘too’; I eat too much, I watch too much trashy tv, I call my husband too many times, and I think too much.  (Not in the anti-feminist way, in the I-really-don’t-need-to-be-worrying-about-what-would-happen-if-Kyle-was-hit-by-a-truck-and-survived-as-a-living-vegetable-and-would-I-be-able-to-stay-with-him way.)  Today I binged on the latter of those, and this post is the resulting purge.

Let me start by saying that I’m really happy with who I’ve become.  Regardless of my situation in life, (ie, lack of job, stuck in apartment, frustrated by sucky retail job,) I’m proud of who I am as a person.  I feel as if I see myself and the world more clearly than I ever have before.   I don’t let people push me around the way I used to, I can articulate myself in ways that I never could, and I see the world more fairly than I ever have before.  When I look back on all the me’s that have existed in the world, I like this one the best.  I’ve made a lot of choices in my life, and though some of them may not have been the smartest in the world, I don’t regret any of them.  I don’t believe in regret, because here’s the thing: I am a culmination of my experiences.  Sure, attempting to date a serious player and having my heart broken may not have been one of the more enjoyable experiences in my life, but if I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have been bitter and careless enough to recklessly started dating a guy that I hardly knew and had nothing in common with.  And, you know, marrying him 2 years later.  So I can’t regret that train wreck of a “relationship” because despite how painful and unhealthy it was, it was also responsible for a large chunk of my present happiness.  So I can confidently say that I have no regrets.

Except that I do…kind-of.

I don’t regret the decisions that I made in my past, being the person that I was then and knowing what I did at the time.  But I wish I could make those decisions over again, being the person I am and knowing what I do now.  The me in high school was too worried about the opinions of others to stand up for herself, but the me today actually has the balls to call people out.  The me entering college was too insecure to let go of her identity as a dancer, but the me today knows that there’s more to me than that.  I can’t regret the way I handled those situations then, but I wish that I had possessed the courage and self-awareness that I do today, then.

But what’s worse, is that this is a conversation that I will have with myself until the day I die.  You know when you’re at the optometrist’s with the lens thingy in front of your face and the doctor’s flipping through lenses and things start out really blurry but then they get clearer and clearer until *click* everything is sharp and perfectly clear?   That’s what I feel like my life is going to be like.  Every year I’ll see the world with a little more clarity, but always too late to make the best choices in my life.  At 25, at 30, at 50…I’ll love the person that I am, but wish that I’d had that much clarity and wisdom when I was making whatever the last big decision in my life was.  Only when I’m 92 and on my deathbed will I truly understand the world and my place in it, and by then all my decisions will be made.

But I suppose this is part of growing up and living life.  Being able to tell stories about how we were “young and stupid.”  I guess all I can do is be happy with who I am now and hope that I’m making decisions today that will make my 50 year old self proud.

And PS-If they’ve invented time travel and my high school self is reading this, just tell everyone to fuck off.  It works in the future, I promise.

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YOU’RE NOT FUNNY, SETH MACFARLANE!

Normally, that statement would be a travesty, a boldfaced lie.

Not tonight.

So, I’m sitting on the couch this evening with my laptop.  I want to write a new post because it’s been like 3 days, but frankly, I’m dry.  I have never felt more uninspired in my life.  So I’m sitting here, watching Family Guy, and trying to figure out a way to phone it in, when I found my inspiration.

Tonight’s Family Guy episode.  (The Juice Is Loose; it’s not on YouTube yet but give it an hour.)

It begins nicely.  A fun episode.  Nice interview bit between Brian and Stewie, some Cleavland and Joe making out,  and a nice mix of violence and vomit.  Good times.  And then I hear Peter utter the 6 words that make me want to stab a baby in the eyes: “Ladies and gentlemen, Mr Conway Twitty.”

For those of you who aren’t Family Guy connoisseurs, the Conway Twitty gag is one where in the middle of an episode, Peter will say, “Ladies and gentlemen, Mr Conway Twitty,” and they’ll cut away to a live action shot of a Conway Twitty performance.  The gag was marginally funny the first time it was used.  I put it in the same category as the fighting chicken gag, or the Peter falling and clutching his knee gag; you kind-of chuckle, and take the opportunity to get up and get more orange juice and graham crackers.

But the Conway Twitty gag on tonight’s episode was 5 FUCKING MINUTES LONG!  Which is a really long-ass time to watch something that’s NOT FUNNY!  Seriously, they played an entire Conway Twitty song.  Who the hell is Conway Twitty, anyway?  And what in god’s name made Seth MacFarlane think that we would find him funny?  How is that funny?  IT’S NOT!  It’s long and boring and annoying and it makes me want to rip my own eyes out.

Seth MacFarlane, I have been a fan for a very long time.  I pride myself in being able to name the episode within the first 2 minutes.  But you’re on notice.  Cut out the Conway Twitty shit.

And now, ladies and gentlemen…

It’s still not funny.

UPDATE:  Apparently the Twitter world agrees with me, because Conway Twitty is now the #2 trend on Twitter.  But in happier news, MacFarlane is on Twitter as well, so now I can tell him myself how much he failed.

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